I just finished watching the movie "The Ultimate Gift" on my laptop. I don't have a tv, so I make do with the laptop when I decide to sit down and actually watch a movie (which isn't very often). I needed a diversion from thinking on the events that have been happening in my life.
So much has happened in the last month or so.
The list of trials and personal tears shed are numerous. I even have an unpublished draft post on here that spells out a long night of prayer and tears that I had for myself a few weeks back.. but, these things are teaching me some things that I hadn't understood quite as well as I thought I had. It is quite amazing to me right now, but even though alot of this stuff I've been experiencing has been really difficult- it has also been worth the experience. Not sure how to explain that exactly, but its been like opening the jar of fireflies and taking a closer look at what makes us (or myself as an example) light up, what makes the world shine? We are the what makes up the world, are we not?
In my way of thinking, the jar is representative of us on an individual scale, and the fireflies representative of all the "lights" that could possibly be inside one person. All the dreams, all the things we could accomplish... it all seems so real to me all of a sudden. I've always believed in my own dreams and my ability to make them a reality- but somehow, right this very moment, I'm feeling a strong sense of conviction. I'm not trying to make them happen anymore, they're already there and I'm just walking the steps neccessary to get to them.
I'm used to "going thru" things, so the idea of letting them stop me from going to where I intend to go with these dreams of mine, seems really absurd. I'm re-discovering a concept I learned early on as a child- that whatever we go through might be difficult, but the challenge of learning to walk through those trials makes us more than just stronger on the inside- it also shapes our confidence, our abilities and skills needed to obtain our goals, and perhaps more importantly it shapes our hearts. It makes us better humans, better people.
The most beautiful thing I've ever seen is a person with a heart that wants to be more than they can imagine, and they believe their heart when it says the impossible is always possible. I am sitting here right now thinking how blessed I am to know several wonderful human beings who are this way. I am also chuckling to myself as I write this knowing that each one of them would shake their head at me and say I need to re-examine what I think I know about them. They can disagree all they want, I know what it is I see in each of them. Someday, the world will see it too.
I guess what I'm saying is this:
We are meant to dream and we are all meant to share with the world what beautiful dreams we have inside of us. This, this is where my thoughts take me...
Have a wonderful week everyone!