Thursday, October 28, 2010

Papers Filled

Photo taken from

Papers Filled by April L.Gerard

There are paper notes here,
words written,
never shared,
that say so much more
than I ever really say out loud.

papers filled,
edges blurred.
Ink. Just ink.

I hear melodies in my head
when the words seem more like song,

I hear the sounds of others voices,
when the words are things I want them to hear.

papers filled,
Ink. Just ink...

yet, the substance
the feel of it,
the tones and textures-
is so much more.

These matter to me,
people matter to me.
So much really does matter to me,

There are papers here,
filled with goals and dreams.
Filled with what I see in you
What I see in me.

its not just Ink.
Not. Just. Ink.

Its all.
Its Everything,
all the beautiful things
that are within you.
Within me.

it runs the ink dry,
blurs the edges...

These words
they say so much more
than I know how to say,
about the beauty of
what it means to be
as human as we.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Tangled Shades

Tangled Shades  by April Gerard

Lines of invisibilities drawn,
what is Right? What is Wrong?

I've heard it said,"Its plain as day, either Black or White"
and I think to myself,
no. No its not.

The world was not based on either or's.
The world is vastly much more.
Sometimes it's both,
sometimes it's neither.

Sometimes grass is not quite green,
and the sky is often more than blue.
Primary colors,as we are taught,
are the base- but not the end result.

Reds, yellows, and blues
become tangled mosaics.
Beautiful and unique,
Shades of grey exist
All photos on this post are
the property and work of my
good friend, Joel Steiner,
Family Services Director
of St. Joeseph County
Habitat for Humanity.
even in nature.

A light may reach and touch,
but in tones, in measures different
than others.

We are not simply lines drawn
with no depth.

We are colored with
shades of Beauty,
shades of Life,
Shades of Love.

Monday, October 18, 2010

A Soul's Light

picture taken and owned by my mother, Sheila Nulf.
A Soul's Light by April Gerard

Uniqueness definitive
of brilliant subtleties.
An uncommoness found
in everyday commons.
Newness yet generations aged.
Wisdom within,
Wonder without.
Ache of possibilities;
half cocked smile
as thoughts of what shines
comes in.
People are beautiful,
our Souls are beautiful.
There is so much to us,
so much.
It could illuminate
the world...

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

A simple design, but new look..

First off, Thank you Ajey for helping to redo the header that I have on truly looks amazing!

I hope that all is well with all of my fellow bloggers/readers across the globe. For myself, I have recently been having some health challenges- but not anything that I can't overcome. I am taking the advice of my doctor and trying to work in more rest and less stress. Overall though, other than being a bit tired every now and then, I'm doing good and will continue to get better everyday. I gotta tell you though, I really don't know how to function well when I force myself to do less instead of more...hmm. Still working on that.

In other news:
As many of you can see, I've managed to learn how to change the look of my blog!  Though the background is for the most part a very simple design, it is a clean and fresh look.  And best of all, I managed to figure out how to do it all by myself (with a little help here and there lol)- including how to backup my blog so that should I need to restore it to what I had before-I could. Also the back up means that I now have a hard copy of all these posts- both the ones published and the ones still in draft form safely copied for future use.   Yeaaaay!

I can figure out this technology ;)  There are still a few fixes I need to do- especially about the previous videos I've posted... but I'm getting there. 

I hope everyone is having a wonderful week!  I know mine is bringing with it some challenges, but I think for the most part I'm ok with that.  It seems I'm learning how to dance- even in the rain, as our dear friend Diane is often apt to say!

and I'm in the mood for a little Sister Hazel here is one of my favorite songs by them its called "Change your Mind", it helps to remind me that all i need to do is to change my attitude when I'm having a frustrating day...:

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Where I Want To Be

I have been on a remarkable journey these last few years of self discovery, self reflection, self forgiveness, self love, and most importantly the forgiveness and love of others..despite anything said or done to my own harm.  I had not realized that these were the things I've been searching for, longing for in my life.  I am finding that as I grow as a human being, I am becoming a better and more compassionate being.  Below is a poem I've recently written and a few quotes that I find to be extremely wise, insightful, and worth carrying in our pockets to remind us everyday of how we should carry ourselves....

Photo of my hands holding a daisy, taken and owned by Triana Evans.

Where I Want To Be   by April Gerard

My life is taking a new direction.
It's beautiful.
It's scary.
But I'm willing to walk it
it's better than where I've been.
It has all that I will ever need.
And, it makes use
of every talent
every dream.
Every seed of hope
that I've ever sown
and continue to sow
Love of Life,
Forgiveness of others,
enduring Joys,
and peace of mind.
This road is where I want to be,
even with it's tears,
the lessons learned, and those
to be learned- This is where I want to be.

 "to forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that that prisoner was you."- Lewis B. Smedes

"Life is easier than you'd think; all that is necessary is to accept the impossible, do without the indispensable, and bear the intolerable." - Kathleen Norris

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?'

Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of the universe; your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so other people won't feel insecure around you. We are born to make manifest the glory of all that's within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone.

And as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others" - Nelson Mandela

Sunday, October 3, 2010


Me, last winter on a "snow mountain" in Elkhart, In. Photo owned and taken by Triana Evans.

BELIEVE    by April L. Gerard

In yourself,
your dreams,
in your ability to forgive others,
AND your ability to forgive yourself.

that mountains will not deter you
that friends can and do make a difference
that Love will find you and Love you anyway,
no matter who you are or what you have or haven't done.

You are beautiful and as you begin to trust that you can,
your heart will know a new feeling,

a new way of seeing the world.
Just Believe.