Tuesday, February 9, 2010

A Woman's War: Short Story of fiction

Wow, its been a long while since I've posted a short story on here.  I know these often times take a bit more time to read, so I do hope you each don't mind the little bit of diversion from the normal poetry, etc. Sometimes you just need to do something different.

So, here you all go-as promised, a short story of fiction. Hope you guys like it.

A Woman’s War
A short story of fiction by April Gerard

She turned to stare at nothing but the wall of grey in front of her. It was so much like she felt. Nothing. A blank page for a blank mind, just the way she wanted it right now. But it didn’t mean she liked it. Every other thing she tried to keep her mind on failed. So, it was best to keep it clear. To keep it from reaching that one thought that would break it all apart. That one emotion really is what she was aiming at keeping tucked away. There was no use for it, at least not in this time and space.

She thought and thought and wondered, how did it get so wrong? Her heart betrayed her- belied that what she yearned for was the right thing. But she knew well that the heart was wrong. Silence had taught her that. His silence.

She had made a vow though, a promise of friendship she did not give up on easily. It was not in her nature to stop being friends with a good friend.

So how to be that friend when she knew the silence of the other was out of awkwardness, out of avoidance, out of the fact that they’d rather forget that remember. Because, really who wants to be reminded that their hearts lept before thought got the better of them? And who really wants to be tempted by what they can’t have when they feel obliged to stay in their current choices?

The grey wall stared back at her. She was torn, but refused to acknowledge the fact. Her draft of an unsent message beckoned her to send it, to tell him exactly what weighed on her mind every day. But she fought it off, taking herself to that blank space of grey in her mind and willing that her heart would no longer listen to its voice when the call would never be answered by the other. She willed herself to move on from her foolish frivolities of wanting and longings. And she dared herself to forget the most beautiful memory that encased her mind’s vision of its scenery.

It was a dare she lost daily.

She turned away from the wall. It wouldn’t give her anymore answers, it couldn’t. Just like so many things in life, the question of whether or not a heart really truly knows best was still just as elusive as it had always been.

She sighed. She knew that wasn’t true.

She knew deep down, her heart had been right. But there was nothing to be done about it. The wrong time and place happens to everyone all the time. All she had to do was pretend that she never saw the look in his eyes. The one that told her, her heart was right.

Problem was, he was never going to let it know it was right.

1 comment:

Triana said...

I'm very proud of you my friend :)
Pact: I'll hold your chin up and you hold up mine. Between the two of us, one day we'll each wake up in the morning and be able to look the world in the eye without reservation. No promises on a time frame. Just, one day.